Trust Is Number One
Children are the most precious thing a parent can trust you with. This is an understatement of course. There are many emotions that go along with registering a child for school of any age, let alone our under five population. There is a sense of excitement, nervousness and sheer horror. Most children that young haven’t been away from a family member or close friend that many hours a day ever, so the expectations are high. My director shared a piece of advice with us that she received from a specialist in our field. “Parents don’t expect you to treat their children as they do, they expect you to treat them better”. Profound. Not because they are paying good money, but rather you are a professional and you better do your damn job.
We are everything when the children are in our care. We greet them first thing in the morning, we feed them, change them, hug them, kiss their booboos, comfort them when sad, make them laugh, play with them, teach them, correct them and on and on it goes. All that and we just met. That is how fast kids can adapt. Keep in mind, if they can adapt to us so quickly, we must do the same for them. A parent should have a sense of only comfort upon meeting you. They won’t always adore you, but if they do keep their child in your school/class, they obviously trust you at least. That is the most important thing in the parent/teacher relationship. Their child will spend more time with you weekly than most other people. This is why you must be genuine from day one.
What I mean by that is all teachers have a different style, a different deminer, an overall different personality as humans do. This is why I believe an orientation is a good idea. Some may think it’s a little silly as there is no actual curriculum, but we do still have a schedule. More importantly, it’s nice not to be strangers. This is important for both teacher and parent. Some teachers don’t smile, lets face it . Some parents don’t either, sorry. When you get to meet each other before the child is actually left in your care, the parent has their gut to go on as well. We all have intuition, some more than others, and this short moment gives the parents a little more confidence in their choice of school.
Orientation
My advice is, while you’re giving your presentation, be yourself. A nervous mother or father can spot a fake in an instant when involving their child. So if you are the type that is honest when a kid “drives you nuts”, then crack a few jokes about just that. Tactfully of course, do not blur this line. For example, when discussing story time, perhaps throw in something along the lines of “Before I begin reading, I tell the children there will be a quiz afterwards” and chuckle. Something as silly as that kind of let’s them know, ok, this one gets it. So when they catch you on an “off” day, they aren’t in complete shock. You can be honest and say, oof, they got me good today and it doesn’t come off fresh or unprofessional, just funny. And honest. If you don’t show your silly side, and a child gave you a little trouble one day, you can’t say something like “he gave me a run for my money today”. The fake you they met is the one they are going to remember and they may get very insulted. If by chance you’re a little more serious, which you probably shouldn’t be with this demographic, then by all means, let them see that. Honestly, to me, that would be a turn off, but at least if they try to complain later on, they kind of already knew what they were getting in to. We all have had the “mean teacher” at some point in our lives, but does anyone deserve that at two, three and four years old. That’s for another day.
What I also do during orientation, is let the parents know who is really in charge. The class. I explain to them my schedule. At 9:00 we do this, at 9:35 that and so on. I am sure to tell the parents that these are just guidelines. We do our best to stick to this, but it all depends on the mood of the room. Teachers must accept that just as adults have rough days, so do children. Prepare everyone, including yourself that not every day is going to go according to plan. It keeps things fun. The same thing every day can get to anyone so lets save that for elementary school. I have days where circle time can go on for 30 minutes. (that’s a long time for two year olds), then I’ll have a day where I can’t even get through our Good morning song. Maybe they are playing so nicely that you let them go a little longer than usual. Maybe you stayed outside a little too long and didn’t get around to finishing their projects.
This little bit of honesty early on will go a long way. Parents will understand. As long as the kids are safe, happy and clean it’s a good day at school. I am also sure to tell them that if they don’t see a project sent home for a day or two that it is usually because we are decorating our bulletin boards and such. Just reassure them that the class is always kept busy. Idle hands…..
Communication and Honesty
I know this may all sound like common sense, but these things that seem little really aren’t. Of course the parents are interested in what their child is doing all day. It’s a long day. It has always been tough talking to the parents at the end of the day but since covid, a lot of schools don’t even really let anyone in anymore, so it’s even harder now. Take those few seconds at the end of the day to add something other than he/she had a good day. If there really isn’t much to report, a simple they ate well, they had a great nap, danced up a storm, had a blast outside, just shows you are a little more involved and that their child is an individual to you. Again, this may seem like silly advice, but take it from me, it can completely change your relationship with the parents. September till June is a long time. Communication and honesty, though not always welcome, are not only important, but necessary for everyone.
